Amber Talks Feeling 'Lost at Sea,' the 'White Noise' of Her Career, Importance of Language & #MeToo

Amber Talks Feeling 'Lost at Sea,' the 'White Noise' of Her Career, Importance of Language & #MeToo


Back in 2009, Amber Liu arrived on the Okay-pop scene as one-fifth of woman group f(x). A tomboyish rapper, the California-born star spent the following decade exploring her artistry each in and outdoors of the South Korean music scene. While the experimental pop group hasn’t launched any new music collectively since 2016, every of the members has pursued a solo profession, and Amber has come into her personal as a Transpacific singer-songwriter primarily based out of each Seoul and Los Angeles.

Earlier this yr, she signed with Stateside illustration and launched her Rogue Rouge mixtape, and now she’s embarking on her upcoming Gone Rogue tour in December. But earlier than touring, she first needed to launch two intensely intimate songs.

Out on Thursday, Amber’s “White Noise” and “Lost at Sea” had been written a number of years in the past and replicate on the hardships of each the star’s private lives by means of a mellow model of emotive EDM. Streets Talkin went by means of the brand new songs with Amber simply forward of their launch and mentioned their inspirations, the significance of her family and friends, #MeToo, and her evolving artistry.

“White Noise” and “Lost at Sea” have two totally different concepts behind them. Why did you resolve to launch them as a paired set?

The producers on the tracks, Darren [Smith] and Sean [Alexander], I’ve been working with them for a few years now and I feel this was round that period of me making an attempt to simply strive new issues. And they had been very, very supportive of doing that. I simply thought that the EDM-inspired components undoubtedly sound-wise paired very well. But additionally it’s the development of my story, I assume. I wrote each songs at comparable instances, so I believed that is the following step of the story that I need to present to folks.

What is that story of Amber that you just need to be telling folks proper now?

I assume my complete factor for the time being is simply “evolution.” If I may simply put it into one phrase. It’s about my journey of the previous 10 years that I’ve been doing this for. I feel there’s a aspect that I actually need to present to the followers that sort of simply exhibits me rising up a little bit bit. Or lots. I don’t know. I don’t need to power anyone, like “I’M GROWN UP!” I feel that undoubtedly as I’ve gotten older my perspective adjustments. My love of music has undoubtedly not modified, my love of the humanities has undoubtedly not modified. I assume I’m not the 15-year-old Amber I used to be 10, nicely now 11, years in the past. I do my taxes. I do my very own bookkeeping. I pay hire.

Your newest releases have come very far out of your earliest sound in f(x), the place you began out as a rapper. It actually has been, as you say, an evolution. So what a part of that development impressed “White Noise”?

I wrote “Lost at Sea” and “White Noise” round two to 3 years in the past, and I keep in mind at the moment — it was that section of my life the place I used to be simply so confused about every thing. Like what I used to be doing, why I’m doing issues, the place I have to be. Everything was at all times in a static, and I used to be like, “It’s like a white noise.” So that’s the title of the track. [Laughs] There’s that lyric that always repeats, “I’m telling you don’t lose your approach dwelling.” And I feel that was the little voice in my head saying, “Though you’re confused now, you’re making an attempt to do every thing and you may’t simply determine it out. Don’t neglect the place you got here from. Or don’t neglect who you’re in that course of.” Did you see the music video by any probability?

Not but.

In the music video there are these bears that come out. Cute little teddy bears. That [first] bear is definitely my childhood bear. I’ve it nonetheless. That was given to me after I was born. The comic story with that bear is, I keep in mind after I first left for Korea I left the bear within the States. I left it there after which I feel, after I was in Korea as a result of it’s a international nation for me, it by no means felt like dwelling. And then after I went again to the States, I took the bear again to Korea. And I used to be like, “Okay, now that is dwelling.” So I hoped that wherever this bear caught with me, it could really feel like dwelling. And that’s what it represents, hopefully determining the place this house is. Later on within the music video you see that I commerce it in for one more bear. That symbolizes me, principally, as a result of the business or folks in society need you to make certain issues you need to be. This greater, made-up character. And that’s what I believed I wanted to do. And I attempted. And, you recognize, ultimately I couldn’t lose my first bear. And yea, that’s the inspiration behind it. The bear story.

Is the track speaking to little Amber, or speaking to individuals who you suppose are going by means of comparable conditions?

Both. Definitely it’s a story about me speaking to myself, however as I felt scripting this track– Me and numerous my pals, I do know folks round me as nicely, all of us undergo this section, fixed phases of being confused, not figuring out the hell what we’re doing. So not solely is that this track for me however for everybody, and it’s devoted to my pals. Definitely with everyone’s tales that I’ve been listening to for such a very long time, or when my pals vent to me about their issues. All that, all of their tales get built-in into my story as nicely.

You talked about how the theme of it’s discovering your approach dwelling, so a number of years because you’ve written “White Noise” how do you are feeling about the place you’re at?

Looking again now, I undoubtedly really feel like my static has lessened. I really feel like, “Wow, I didn’t know something again then.” In the method, within the span of two to 3 years, all of the issues that I discovered and all of the experiences that I used to be capable of be aside of– I assume it simply provides me affirmation in my coronary heart that it’s going to at all times get higher if I work in direction of it.

Changing issues up, “Lost at Sea” is sort of a darkish love track.

Yeah. [Laughs] Yes, it’s technically a love track. When you meet lots of people and also you date any person otherwise you’re simply in a relationship with pals, lovers, enterprise or no matter it might be, there are folks which can be simply poisonous to you and also you don’t even comprehend it your self. I keep in mind on this particular relationship that I used to be having, in my perspective, I did every thing that I may. And there was preventing, no communication occurring, however we nonetheless cherished one another, however then nothing would get higher. Because of that emptiness-slash-craziness, I simply felt like I used to be misplaced in the course of the ocean, trigger waves will take you totally different locations however you by no means know the place you’re going. It’s simply this infinite ocean you retain being misplaced in. In the lyrics it talks about “I’m sorry I allow us to down,” ["‘Cause I let us down/ I let you down"] however I additionally blame so-and-so, that you just’re like this ["‘Cause no matter what I do/ It don’t get through to you"]. It was like that complete psychological back-and-forth that I had. “I’m sorry that I did this. But wait, you’re incorrect. But then- I don’t know.” It was that complete emotional instability that goes on within the relationship as nicely.

Both songs are fairly introspective and about private hardships, however had been written a number of years in the past. Is that the place you’re nonetheless at?

I’m nonetheless tying up some free ends. One of my targets at all times, after I write music, is that it’s not solely me sharing my story with the followers, it’s additionally a reminder to myself that, “Hey, I stated this in order that I must develop from it.” With “White Noise,” it’s on the market. I’ve to remind myself that I’m going to be misplaced, however don’t lose your approach dwelling. “Lost at Sea,” I simply have to have the ability to determine an issue and be capable of work by means of it or determine when relationships are — “Oh, that is going south.” Having these two issues in thoughts, I do know that I’m nonetheless in a “White Noise” section. I feel I’ll at all times be in a “White Noise” section. But it’s at all times extra clear. I’m at all times “Lost at Sea”; I’ve been in one other relationship the place I used to be in the identical factor. I hate having an issue and never having the ability to determine or having the ability to know what to do usually, I assume that’s the place I’m going. I must know every thing. But it’s getting higher as I study from my experiences or my errors. I can be eternally within the “White Noise” section. Yay.

You launched the songs proper after saying your Gone Rouge tour. How does this tie in to that and your earlier Rogue Rouge mixtape?

Rogue Rouge, to me, was the beginning of me making an attempt to determine if one among my missions was doable, and that mission was that "pals in enterprise" factor. “Can I work with my pals and, hopefully with all of the experiences I’ve had within the business thus far, may I take a look at out my options to sure issues?” Like delays, communication traces; it was all technical and logistics in that sense. And additionally, can I put out good music on the identical time, a fantastic challenge? So it was an enormous experiment between enterprise and inventive as a result of typically you’ll be able to’t have each. With me and my pals, we actually simply sort of got here collectively and simply stated –sorry– “Fuck it, let’s strive.” I’ve countless gratitude to my pals, I like them a lot. They supported me alongside the best way, to have helped me to develop by means of that complete course of. And we made what we may, and we’re undoubtedly studying to make our content material at all times higher. That challenge means every thing to me, only for the truth that I did it with my pals. And I needed to present one thing again to the followers as nicely. That was the primary factor, giving again to my followers. I needed to present one thing free. [We were] placing on the market what we love, what we do for the artwork. And we hoped everyone preferred it.

With the response that I obtained, I used to be simply so joyful as a result of it’s very totally different from what I used to be doing and I feel within the course of… Every yr after I write music, sounds slowly change and traits sort of change as nicely. I don’t know if I’m capable of say this however I feel I’m, I really feel like possibly the followers and the common public didn’t actually perceive what was occurring between my musical development in between. It most likely sort of was a smack within the face like, “Here’s a bunch of music! It’s all totally different now.” But everyone was very supportive of it and that’s why I needed to make a tour round this mixtape.

This is my first solo tour on the whole and it’s going to be within the States. I simply need to use this chance to, primary, placed on a fantastic present for the followers but in addition to get to know them, be extra intimate with them, play with them. It’s been a very long time since I toured and I’m simply actually enthusiastic about touring as a result of it’s going to be enjoyable. I’m doing it with pals too. The choreographer is a homie, the band are homies, I’m touring with Justin Park which goes to be freaking superior. I’m simply actually excited. The complete crew is coming collectively, and we simply need to placed on a superb present for everyone.

You talked about that you just really feel folks could probably not know the place you’re at proper now musically, and also you’re additionally in a state of flux proper now between working in South Korea and the U.S.

Yea… So, sort of working back-and-forth is attention-grabbing as a result of [laughs] there are these instances I hate in the course of the day as a result of if I’m in LA, it hits round seven or eight PM. I hate my life. That’s when all of Asia wakes up and everybody’s texting me. So I’m simply working later hours. And after I’m in Korea, I get texts actually early within the morning or get up actually early within the morning for convention calls. It’s an adjustment. It’s undoubtedly one thing that I can, [that] I’m capable of deal with, I feel, on account of simply being a Okay-pop idol for therefore lengthy. I’m fairly positive everyone is aware of how late the hours are within the Okay-pop business. It’s simply extra now that I’m doing the logistic stuff, adulting very exhausting. It’s good. We’re simply grinding proper now. It’s hectic however it’s enjoyable.

If somebody launched you as a Okay-pop idol proper now, what would your response be?

I’m not going to disclaim it as a result of it’s undoubtedly the place I began, the place I started my profession. An replace to that’s that I do different music as nicely. I’ve by no means been somebody to be so critical about titles. I do know my managers want a title, I do know my publicist wants a title, or one thing. But I’m simply Amber. Of course, my background will confuse lots of people as a result of I used to be born and raised within the States, I went to Korea, I spent 10 years in a Okay-pop group and doing solo work there and now I’m again within the States. I sort of set myself up for that since I do every thing. But when folks name me a “Okay-pop idol,” yea, if you wish to name me that go forward. But I’m simply Amber. I’m an artist. I communicate totally different languages. I assume if folks simply preserve it at that there’s actually no unhealthy option to say what I do. I simply do numerous issues. That’s what I ought to say in interviews. “Hi, my title is Amber. I do numerous issues.”

Will you give attention to English music or do you suppose you’ll launch music in different languages?

Oh, [I’m] undoubtedly going to launch music in different languages. I really feel like me rising up as a second-generation Chinese youngsters within the States– my mother doesn’t communicate English. I didn’t develop up talking Mandarin. I didn’t communicate it in any respect. I at all times had this disconnect with my mother due to the language barrier. It would at all times simply be actually easy Chinese. “Mom, can I eat?” “Can I’m going right here?” “Can you drop me off?” And after I went to Korea– the final folks you need to name are your dad and mom while you’re in bother or having a tough time. I keep in mind 2012, 2011, or 2013– in that span– I used to be simply so out. My thoughts was simply carried out. I used to be like, “I must name my mother as a result of I do know she is going to perceive.” My mother is the sweetest particular person I’ve ever met. She won’t ever harm a fly. She’s been 150% supportive of every thing I’ve carried out. She’s by no means stated “No” to something, she simply says, “If you need to do it, work exhausting and go do it.” My dad is extra like, “I fear about you.” My dad’s a complete dad. My mother’s 100%, “If it makes you cheerful, go do it.” So going again to that 2011-2013-ish of my life, I used to be like, “Let me name my mother.” I keep in mind speaking in my damaged Chinese to her for 2 hours at 5 within the morning. It simply made me notice how a lot language is so necessary to folks and the way it connects folks.

I don’t need to lose that reference to folks, and that complete expertise with my mother isn’t similar to, “Oh, simply because I can communicate it I’m going to sing in it.” There’s that connection that I’ve, language. I’ve met a few of my greatest pals in Korea who solely communicate Korean. I’ve met a few of my greatest pals who solely communicate Mandarin. There’s folks in Japan– I barely communicate any Japanese however I’m completely cool with them as a result of we simply discuss physique language. I by no means need to lose that connection. I’ve ambition to try to communicate each language in the entire world, that’s completely not doable for me. I’m going to strive. See what occurs.

Both songs are about inner turmoil, so when you don’t thoughts me asking, final October, you posted on Instagram about some of the tumultuous social phenomenons of our time, #MeToo. You wrote that you just needed so as to add your voice as nicely. Why was it so necessary so that you can communicate up, and what does it imply for you coming from the Korean music world?

It’s how the #MeToo motion began. People don’t perceive that these items go on even in leisure. It’s one thing that I feel — it’s occurred to me earlier than, and it’s occurred to pals of mine. It’s unhappy to see that there are lots of people that undergo it. If everyone begins talking up about it, I simply hope that every time somebody thinks they’ll make the most of folks and abuse their energy, that karma’s going to return again to you. That’s such a not Amber factor to say. I’m at all times about love. [But] when you’re going to make actually unhealthy selections and do horrible issues to folks, I simply hope that you just study your lesson indirectly.

It’s simply actually… It’s one thing that I feel actually must be talked about. We’re all scared. People who’re victims are at all times scared. Again, those that aren’t affected by it or aren’t even concerned in it don’t know that it occurs. They suppose, “Oh yeah, 2018. This stuff doesn’t occur anymore.” It occurs day-after-day. It’s simply one thing that I feel folks must not assume that [it doesn’t exist]. People simply must do every thing that they’ll to get a task or get a job. To be actually trustworthy, I’m not the poster youngster to speak about this in each approach. I simply must. There are issues which have occurred to me the place I’ve been extraordinarily uncomfortable, the place I’ve been in conditions the place I didn’t have a selection, the place I believed I didn’t have a selection, the place I used to be compelled into sure issues. And that goes for my pals as nicely. However, in an business the place it’s all about enjoyable and leisure, a cheerful world, these items occur. You shouldn’t assume that simply because our complete — that business, or any business, that stuff doesn’t exist as a result of it does. And it’s sickening.

I feel folks need to play it off like, “No, it doesn’t exist. It’s positive.” Like, no dude. We have to speak about this as a result of it occurs day-after-day. We can’t be oblivious to [it], and we have now to discover a answer, hopefully by treating one another with respect and treating folks the best way we need to be handled. Finding methods to speak about it, and in addition to search out resolve to it’s what we have to work in direction of. It’s going to take time, and I’m not saying, “We must discover a answer proper now!” We want to speak about it, determine what the issue is, the place it’s coming from, and attempt to discover a answer to repair [the power imbalance]. I feel that’s what we have now to try for. As a society, we evolve. Hopefully we are able to come to a compromise the place it’s for the betterment of society. That’s what I see it as.